A Mirror

I’ve been involved in animal rescue for over a decade. And one thing I have learned, after visiting hundreds of shelters and rescues, and meeting even more animals and rescuers, is that our animals are a mirror. Our animals are a mirror of us. Our personalities, like and dislikes, triggers and insecurities seem to mirror each other. I’ve seen this countless times.

Most recently, when our dog Brickle passed away, our other dog Fruitycake was struggling. Struggling to find his way. His purpose. And why? Because I didn’t know my way. Or my purpose. And it was as frustrating to him as it was to me. A mirror. Fruitycake was my mirror.

This week, somehow, we found some of our way and a routine in hiking again. This week, we seemed to connect more. And although we are so stressed in trying to get heat for the winter, we were able to deal with it better. Because our determination was mirroring the other. And we both knew we could finally count on each other.

Mirror. Another metaphor and another physical thing I need here. Shocking fact. I haven’t looked in a mirror since Brickle died. I haven’t looked in a mirror since we arrived to this house. And he died the week after. Why? I don’t know. I can’t put it into words. Maybe you can. Looking for your thoughts.

But tomorrow, I feel like I need to get a mirror. Buy one. We are taking the day to go to a nearby town and look at second hand items. Things we may be able to afford for our home. And I think I need a mirror. I don’t know why. But perhaps, maybe, I need to see who Fruitycake sees. Who the world sees. I am just not sure I’m ready to make changes. Needed changes. I feel them coming.

-Rachael